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Stop Dreading Life

I was sitting in the shower today shaving my legs…it’s where I have thoughts. (i can’t be the only shower thinker…right?)

I have a lot on my mind. Job. Moving. Visa. End of School. Assignments. 20 kids. Baking cakes.

It’s overwhelming sometimes. But as I sat there with a tropical peach lather on my legs with a very old razor I realised that this is the beginning of my life. A life that I’ve always wanted to have. Freedom from everything. My own discretion. My own decisions. The ability to get rid of the past and move onto the future that I’ve wanted to carve out for myself.

….so why am I dreading it?

I don’t know. Maybe it’s the scared or fear or unknown that wants to keep be tucked into a place that’s comfortable and easy.

….I shouldn’t be dreading the beauty of the life that I’m about to start living

It reminds me of this song “Free” ~Pete Murray.

 It’s a decision to either embrace or dread things. It’s weird to think and to admitt that you’re dreading change, a change that you’ve so desired, because you don’t have all the answers. It’s silly really.

I shaved my right leg with a new-found sense of excitment. Yeah, I may not make all the right choices or save as much as I need to or always be anxiety free…but I can choose to stop dreading it.

~M

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